Friday, November 7, 2014

The Love of My Life


Early Thursday morning, October 30th, I lost the love of my life.

I know lots of people are not comfortable with the loss of a loved one and the story of what happened.  However, my husband left in such a beautiful way, I wanted to share it with you.  If you are uncomfortable with reading this account--I truly, deeply understand.  ((HUGS))

I knew something was wrong and I felt uneasy, so Toez the Polydactyl Cat and I sat beside him, as he slept in his big chair.  Suddenly he clutched the top part of his chest and said he was in awful pain.  A moment later, his eyes grew large, and he gasped as though he saw something indescribably wonderful.

I called 911, and I performed  CPR until the ambulance came.  Our dear children were able to arrive before he left for the hospital, and we were together there when he flew away to heaven.

As we were hugging and kissing him goodbye, telling him what a wonderful Husband and Father he was and how much we loved him--to be at peace and to not worry about us, the walls of the emergency room were lined with the people who had fought so hard to save him.  We told him he had done a great job and we sang his favorite songs and held him as long as we could.  Those wonderful people surrounded us....their heads bowed, hands folded, many with tears running down their faces.  After a time, they trickled from the room--but stayed close by in the hallway.

As we were getting ready to leave, the head RN came in and said, "We see a lot of these, but it is rare to find a family handle this moment with such great rare beauty, love and dignity."  Then he gave us his card and said, "If you need anything let us know."

I have been married to Alan for 31 wonderful years.   This wonderful man was the love of my life.

I want to share something beautiful that happened to me early Saturday morning. As I lay trying to sleep, a small sweet breeze slid across my face...and then his dear lips pressed against mine.  My husband kissed me goodbye.

Alan was a servant of God and He loved people. He wanted everyone to know God loved them too, and so I am passing his message on to you--God loves you.  He longs to know you, God wants to share His son and the world He created for you--in a whole different way than you've ever known.

My precious friends--many of you, who have suffered terrible pain and loss--may God bless you with joy--even in the midst of great sorrow.


  1. Hello Beth, I am extremely sorry to read this. My heartfelt condolences. May God give you the courage to bear this irreparable loss. May his soul rest in peace.

    No doubt Allan was a wonderful man. He had a good death surrounded by his family. God will take care of him and give him everlasting happiness.

  2. Dear Beth, I am so sorry to hear of your loss, thank you for sharing your beautiful story., how lovely that you were able to feel the beauty of those moments. Sending you hugs x x Ruthie ps: sorry also I haven't visited in so very long, where do the days go.x